Sisi And The Sisterhood
Since she began dating married father-of-four Balthazar Getty last summer, Sienna Miller’s been categorically told by movie bosses that she’s hugely disliked by women the world over.
Now, after she was dropped from big budget blockbuster Nottingham, and her latest movie Hippy Hippy Shake was branded “unreleasable” by set insiders, Sisi’s career is in freefall and she’s pulling out all the stops to try to claw back some female fans.
Ahlan! charts (and rates!) her desperate attempts to get back into our good books...
Attempt one: Play the sympathy card
Sienna recently complained how she’s “experienced the judgement of women in the past year.” Adding that she’s been “at war” with women who’ve judged her. “We say we want to be equal, but men don’t sit around b******* at each other. There’s no sisterhood,” Sisi complained.
Result:Passing the buck and refusing to acknowledge her own crimes against the sisterhood, is not going to elicit sympathy from the girls.
Attempt two: Pretend her body isn’t perfect
Despite no doubt being aware that most women would kill for her super-slender figure, the 27-year-old claims that “things are wobbling” on her tight bod. “I should go to the gym,” twittered Sisi.
Result:Unforch, she comes off sounding like the patronising skinny girl, trying to empathise with her plus-sized pals.
Attempt three: Hit out at fame
“Ugh, the pedestal thing stops me sleeping,” she moaned to Style magazine about her fame. “Then I was like, f*** it, actually. It’s not where the focus should be. LA is a nightmare for that. Young girls are having pre-emptive Botox.”
Result:Are we really supposed to believe that Sienna’s been losing sleep over all the poor young girls in T-Town? Not buying it!
Attempt four: Claim to be ageing
“I’m getting wrinkles,” claims Sienna. “I say, let people be young and then be old. I can’t wait to be seen as a woman. And I know I probably have to contribute to that with my behaviour.”
Result:Ooh, how trendy and don’t-care-cool of Sisi to cut through all the BS and say, ‘Be young, be old, like, who cares about wrinkles? Live freeeee!’ Honey, your profession is built on looks – don’t pretend it isn’t.