Clearly Jeremy Piven's been taking a leaf or two out of his fast-talking Entourage character Ari Gold's book because the vertically challenged actor's got an excuse for getting him out of pretty much everything - and most of them, bizarrely, revolve around food.
In the wake of sushi-gate (when The Pive pulled out of his play Speed The Plow claiming he'd been struck down with a bout of sushi-related mercury poisoning) Jezza now reckons soya milk is to blame for his man-boobs.
Speaking about his perky B-cup moobs, the 44-year-old lamented, "I've found out soya milk has enough oestrogen for me to grow breasts; I had to put the soya milk down."
We're soooo going to channel The Pive next time we need a fast excuse. Late for work? "It's not my fault, it was those pesky cornflakes!" Pranged the car? "The tuna salad I had a lunch made me do it." It's genius.