Coleen McLoughlin and Wayne Rooney

Ahlan! Loves: Coleen Taking Wayne Back

22 Sep 2010

All is right in WAG world once more. Phew

Why? Just as night follows day; thunder follows lightning and Smithers follows Mr Burns, the news that Coleen has taken Wayne Rooney back after he cheated with a skank means that everything is right in the world and we can all go about our usual business. For a moment Ahlan! was left so confused we didn’t know what our name was or where we lived, when the idea was touted that she may (gasp!) leave him! What the…? A WAG leave her footballer husband for having cheated on her with a hooker whilst she was pregnant, before informing the WAG by text about his indiscretions?

What is the world coming to, we wondered?!

Meeting at their (keyword alert!) ‘mansion’ this week, insiders claim Coleen told potato head, “If it ever happens again, that will be it. The end of the marriage,” before taking him back because he was very very sowwy.

Thank you, Coleen, for making ugly footballers everywhere think they can do what they like and get away with it. All is right in WAG world once more. Phew.t