Ahlan Loves»

Dressed down Diddy

Dressed down Diddy

Note to all P Diddy’s pals (we’re sure he must have one?)

  • Paris’s skills of deduction

    Paris’s skills of deduction

    If she didn’t already have a career as a, erm, whatever it is!

  • Getting ready with P diddy

    Getting ready with P diddy

    This Christmas, spare a thought for those not as fortunate as you... like P Diddy’s girlfriends for instance.

  • Jamie’s credit crunch christmas

    Jamie’s credit crunch christmas

    Things are getting so bad in the economy

  • How selfless blake thinks he is

    How selfless blake thinks he is

    Y’know what words spring to Ahlan!’s mind when thinking about Blake Fielder-Civil?

  • Daniel Craig’s promise

    Daniel Craig’s promise

    Daniel Craig has realised that he could cut out the getting-injured-on-set thing

  • Psychic Geri

    Psychic Geri

    Spice Girl, purveyor of “girl power”, solo artists, actress

  • Isaiah’s Irony

    Isaiah’s Irony

    Remember when Isaiah Washington got booted off of Grey’s Anatomy after nastily outing co-star T R Knight?

  • Keanu: 1 Pap: 0

    Keanu: 1 Pap: 0

    When a dude’s innocent, he’s just, y’know, innocent.

  • Kingston’s ‘tude

    Kingston’s ‘tude

    Ever since his little bro Zuma came on the scene, Gwen’s super-cute eldest son Kingston has been giving it some major atittude – “He’s bugged that someone is in his spot,” chortled dad Gav affectionately, as Kingston circled the new tot’s cot like a preying mantis

  • Eva Green’s confidence

    Eva Green’s confidence

    Much is made by starlets about being “empowered as a woman”. For example, if Ms Aguilera mentions just one more time how “empowered” she feels about her sexuality, then we’re putting her red lippy in the microwave. Or as Beyonce might croon it, “I’m soooOOooo empoOOOweeEEErEEd as a WOMAAAAAAAAN…”

  • Diddy’s imaginary friends

    Diddy’s imaginary friends

    Not just the preserve of security blanket-wielding, mate-starved tweenies, imaginary friends just made it into the realms of hip hop-dom.

  • Minnie’s MySpace move

    Minnie’s MySpace move

    Question: What do you do if you’re a has-been A-lister who has just had a baby that nobody cares about?

  • Kiefer’s Adorable, But not-at-alllll-well-timed fear!

    Kiefer’s Adorable, But not-at-alllll-well-timed fear!

    Li’l Kief, last week revealed that he has a rather bizarre fear –he’s frightened of mirrors!

  • Kingston’s ‘ickle jealousy!

    Kingston’s ‘ickle jealousy!

    Cuteness alert! Gavin Rossdale has admitted that little Kingston has been having a few ‘jealous older bro’ moments when it comes to the family’s new addition, Zuma

  • Celine 'what credit crunch?' Dion

    Celine 'what credit crunch?' Dion

    Since Elton stopped splashing out on his flowers and J-Lo got all 'I'm doing this for my babies, MY BABIES!!

  • Heather Mills: Novelist

    Word on the street is that Heather is all set to pen “a work of fiction” – let’s just repeat that, “a work of fiction”! – about a model and campaigner who marries the most famous rock star in the world.

  • Political Lindsay

    Political Lindsay

    Lindsay Lohan’s got waaaaay more to offer the world than a line of pleather leggings and movies that keep the Razzie Awards going

  • The Cher catwoman rumours

    The Cher catwoman rumours

    Angelina Smangelina! The hot new rumour on the Batman block is that none other than Cher is being tipped to play Catwoman in the third installment

  • Kirsten Dunst’s political influence

    Kirsten Dunst’s political influence

    Thought Kiki’s talents had peaked with Spider-Man 3 and a stint in rehab? Nuh-uh!

  • Katy Perry’s mum

    Katy Perry’s mum

    Girl rock’s new first lady, Katy Perry, came out of nowhere a few months back to storm to the top of the charts with her summer anthem, I Kissed a Girl.

  • How perfect Knox and Vivienne are!

    How perfect Knox and Vivienne are!

    Spawned atop Mount Olympus by Zeus and, erm... Helen Of Troy, during a never-seen-before rose petal storm, whilst unicorns shed rainbow tears into the fairy dust breeze, there appeared two children named Knox and Vivienne.

  • The Malibu sheriff’s department

    The Malibu sheriff’s department

    Shannen's embarrassing 'do you know who I am moment'

  • The thought of Top Gun II

    The thought of Top Gun II

    Okay, so Tom's practically certifiable these days, but if there's one thing that'd make us forget the fact that he's loony toons, it's if he slipped back into Maverick's helmet and hit the brakes so they flew right by.

  • Ronnie’s Russian Roulette

    Ronnie’s Russian Roulette

    Total fun are the public declarations of Ronnie Wood's Russian dollybird, waitress, Ekaterina Ivanova - 41 years his junior - who claims she just wants all the furore surrounding their affair "to go away."

  • Nick’s justification for marrying Mariah

    Nick’s justification for marrying Mariah

    Mr Carey defending his questionable decision to marry Mimi after just a month of dating...

  • Hardcore Miley

    Hardcore Miley

    Warning boys: you better toughen up if you wanna get with Disney star Miley Cyrus

  • How down to earth James McAvoy is

    How down to earth James McAvoy is

    Granted, he's no Jenny From The Block, but we love him anyway

  • How Amy's test results are 'inconclusive'

    How Amy's test results are 'inconclusive'

    Erm, we're no doctors, but we think we could hazzard a guess

  • Jenna putting it out there (right out there!)

    Jenna putting it out there (right out there!)

    When a girl splits from her hubby, she has to get right back on that relationship horse

  • Lindsay's euro dream

    Lindsay's euro dream

    She can barely walk and chew gum at the same time, but Lindsay Lohan reckons that, if she was living in Europe rather than the US, she would be far more cultured and would even - ha ha! - "speak three languages"

  • Tori back in the ‘hood

    Tori back in the ‘hood

    Thank goodness there are still some Hollywood execs out there who recognise talent when they see it!

  • Billy and Kelly thinking we’re falling for it

    Billy and Kelly thinking we’re falling for it

    If you're a star whose fame is on that slippery slidey slope down towards an appearance on a reality TV show with the word "Celebrity" in the title, then there are a few options open to you.

  • Celebs' dumb chat biting them back!

    Celebs' dumb chat biting them back!

    Don't get us wrong, Ahlan!'s one of Liv Tyler's biggest fans. But it seems that one of her silly little opinions has come back to bite her on her curvalicious behind.

  • Madonna’s idea of ‘tying one on’

    Madonna’s idea of ‘tying one on’

    Look out LiLo, there's a party granny all set to steal your bad gal crown.

  • J-Lo’s reality show u-turn

    J-Lo’s reality show u-turn

    After scoring only Dhs21 million for pics of her twins, Li'l Ms Moneybags clearly felt she hadn't milked enough from Max and Emme.

  • How far removed from reality Madonna is

    How far removed from reality Madonna is

    Imagine you're an orphan in Malawi

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