Because ‘badly dressed gal’ would have made the mic too heavy...

Crystal mess
Either Ri poked herself in the eye with her umbrella, or pirate-visits-Swarovski showroom chic is all the rage.

Pond life
Because ‘dragged through a hedge’ had already been done, Ri opted for ‘dragged through a pond’ instead.

Thigh oh why?
No need to ask how the work’s going on that time machine you built directly to Cher’s 80s wardrobe, then.

All aboard
“Okay, got the cool waistcoat, the cute skirt… it needs something else. Conductor’s hat? Yep!”