Why? Life lessons according to Nick Cannon: if you don't want your friends to prevent you doing something really stupid, do it really fast so they don't have a chance to stop you. For example, if they catch you trying to light a cigarette by a petrol pump, strike that match quick, lest their pesky cries of "what are you doing you dim-witted chump!" filter through your cotton wool-stuffed brain and ruin your fun.

Similarly, defending his decision to race down the aisle with Mimi after they'd barely been dating a month, he reasons that he wanted to get it over with before anyone had a chance to object. "I think we didn't want to give people a chance to be like, ‘What are you doing?' What are you talking about? This is so quick. Are you sure?,'" says the rapper. Because God forbid common sense should get a look in. The man's a genius!