Rock matriarch SHARON OSBOURNE has dismissed an outstanding payment lawsuit filed against her by an interior decorator, insisting she has already paid for the items in question - twice. Nice to see us mortals are not the only ones wasting weeks of our lives on customer service reps - is anyone else having BT/NTL/HSBC student flashbacks?

Designer Cheryl Law and the interior decorating company 'Beyond Pillows' filed the legal papers in Los Angeles County Superior Court on Friday, accusing Osbourne of failing to hand over USD $26,388.55 for items purchased earlier this month (we're hoping that wasn't all spent on pillows? What kind of pillows did she buy - ostrich feathers woven with unicorn hair?)

According to the suit, which asks for $26,388.55 plus punitive damages, Osbourne and other unnamed defendants "knew that they did not have sufficient funds to cover the payment, yet they accepted delivery and installation." Hmmm, yeah we're sure those skinto Osbournes were plotting a scam from the start, too.

The papers also claim Osbourne "never had any intention of paying", reports TMZ.com.

But the America's Got Talent judge, 55, has hit back at the allegations and says she paid for the goods - including a custom-made king-sized bed and custom kitchen and bathroom drapes (aaah ok) - by credit card when she ordered the items from Law. But when Law told her her payment had been declined, she handed over another card to be charged - only to later discover she had been debited twice for the items. SHOCKING - how can they sleep at night???

Osbourne's representative tells TMZ, the star has since asked to have the two charges reversed and earlier this week sent a cheque for the outstanding amount to Beyond Pillows to settle the matter.

Well thank goodness you had a rep to sort it out Sharon. The rest of us have to spend nine hours on hold and speak to reps in five different countries in a multitude of languages before we get anywhere.