Why? Alright, so more fool us for giving even just one column inch to this big-toothed rat, but sometimes SPENCER PRATT gets us sooooo mad we could just... write about him!

In his first rap release – I’m A Celebrity – Spence ‘raps’, “Countin’ on the haters everyday to keep me goin’, because without the haters, baby, I would be no one.”

Rhyming ‘going’ with ‘no one’? Tenuous. Continue...

“America hates me, ‘cause the media loves me,” he adds.

America? Try the world, sweetie.